


Study Hard, Play Harder

by aqonoluna



Series: RENREN [1]
Category: Persona 5
Genre: ADHD, Angst and Feels, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, Bickering, Boys Support Boys, Emotional Hurt, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Frustration, Gen, Learning Disabilities, Let Sakamoto Ryuji Say Fuck, M/M, Mutual Pining, Not Beta Read, Sad Persona 5 Protagonist, Sad Sakamoto Ryuji, Sakamoto Ryuji Needs a Hug, Self-Esteem Issues, Studying, anger issues
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-04
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:13:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 9,525
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25700377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aqonoluna/pseuds/aqonoluna
Summary: It’s almost exam time again and Ren can’t bear to watch Ryuji fail once more. Determined to help him pass this time, he first needs to figure out why he hadn’t been able to.
Relationships: Amamiya Ren/Sakamoto Ryuji, Persona 5 Protagonist/Sakamoto Ryuji
Series: RENREN [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1863868
Comments: 67
Kudos: 93





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I’m reposting this story. Sorry! I had to make some edits and it just wasn’t working out in the Ao3 editor! I’m sorry!
> 
> I read a head canon where Ryuji has ADHD and I decided two things: a) to write a story about it as someone who also has ADHD, and b) to use the name Ren in this because I feel like I need to try using it more, especially with the upcoming Western release of the P5 Animation.

[Makoto][17:45] Please don’t forget, everyone: Exams are next week. It would be wise if you focus on studying for and not draw unnecessary attention to yourselves.

[Ryuji][17:45] Ugh. Don’t effin’ remind me.

[Ann][17:45] Can’t you just try to take exams seriously for once?

[Ann][17:45] Can you try to not be a bitch for once?

[Makoto][17:45] Stop it, you two.

[Makoto][17:45] That said, Ryuji, Ann is right. You need to take your exams more seriously. You’ve nearly failed all of your exams this year. It wouldn’t hurt to take this more seriously.

[Ryuji][17:45] Real effin’ bold of ya to assume I don’t take ‘em seriously, Makoto.

[Futaba][17:46] Since when does taking exams seriously mean playing video games all night until you’re not only not prepared but also too tired to take them?

[Ryuji][17:46] Shuddup! I only play video games after I get tired of studying!

[Ren][17:46] Come on guys, lay off. Giving Ryuji a hard time isn’t going to help.

[Haru][17:46] I agree with Ren. There’s no point in making a big deal out of it. Ryuji’s exam results are going to be what they’re going to be. 

[Haru][17:46] We shouldn’t be mean.

[Ryuji][17:46] Uhm... Thanks, Haru. I guess...

[Yusuke][17:47] Well, my exams are over, so I needn’t worry about that.

[Futaba][17:47] No one asked you, Inari.

[Yusuke][17:47] No one asked you either, Futaba.

[Futaba][17:47] You wanna fight me, Inari?!

[Makoto][17:47] Come on, guys! Don’t you two start bickering, too!

Deciding he’s had enough, Ren sighs softly and closes out of the group chat with his friends. Returning his phone in his pant pocket, Ren sighs and heads upstairs with Morgana. 

On the last step before his room, he puts his bag down on the landing. Then moving to sit down on the couch, he watches as his cat jumps out of the bag (there’s a pun there he’s not in the mood to make) and runs across the room to his bed, jumps up on it, and curls up in the middle of it, ready to take an afternoon nap.

“You should probably study for your exams. You don’t want to end up failing like Ryuji will.”

“Mm,” Ren murmurs, looking down at his lap, mind wandering for a moment. Furrowing his eyebrows suddenly, he takes his phone out of his pocket again and goes back to the previous group chat.

**_Real effin’ bold of ya to assume I don’t take ‘em seriously, Makoto._ **

“Then why do you keep failing?” he whispers to himself, scrolling mindlessly up and down through the conversation, as if the answer is there somewhere. It isn’t, of course. _Maybe it is._ “If you care then—?”

“What?” Morgana asks, tiredly, yawning, cutting off Ren’s train of thought, forcing him to look up in the cat’s direction. “What’re you mumbling about over there?” He only heard Ren say something, but not what it was.

“Nothing.” Ren returns his phone to his pocket, frowning to himself. Usually Morgana is asleep by now and for some reason, he finds himself kind of annoyed that he isn’t yet. “Take your nap. I’m gonna go for a walk.”

“I can go with you.”

“No, it’s all right,” Ren replies insistently, waiving a hand dismissively. “I need to go out and think about some stuff on my own. Also, I’m gonna go to the library to study. No cats allowed, unfortunately.”

Morgana scowls at that, but huffs. “Fine.”

Before Ren gets up from the couch to leave, he watches Morgana kneed a spot in his blankets to curl up in. He watches him for a few minutes and, eventually satisfied that he’s actually asleep and isn’t going to follow him, he grabs his lighter-than-usual school bag and heads downstairs.

On his way out to Aoyama-Itchome station, he texts Ryuji.

[Ren][18:09] Meet me at Inokashira Park.

[Ryuji][18:09] Sure, but why?

[Ren][18:09] I’m going to help you study for exams.

[Ryuji][18:09] You’re gonna what?

[Ren][18:09] Just meet me there, please, and bring all your notes and whatever you have, all right? I’m going to help you study for your exams.

[Ryuji][18:10] Uh... Sure, all right. Seems kind of pointless because I’m just gonna fail, but I guess it’s your time to waste, man. S’pose I’ll meet you there soon.

[Ren][18:10] Thank you.

Smiling softly at his phone, satisfied that Ryuji is willing to meet him at the park, Ren puts the phone back in his pocket and heads over to the station. 

Truthfully, he has no idea what beast he’s about to face with regard to Ryuji’s study habits — or even with his note-taking abilities — but it’s a beast Ren is willing to go up against if it means seeing his best friend pass his exams.

It sure would likely do a lot for Ryuji’s self-esteem, and it would get their friends off his back, even if they only mean to chide him in jest — but, most importantly, it would help Ryuji, and all he wants to do is help people. Especially his best friend who endlessly helps him at the drop of a pin.

_I really hope I can do this for you, Ryuji._


	2. Chapter 2

Ren is the first one to arrive at the park. 

In truth, it works out well for him, because it means he can scope out somewhere quiet for him and Ryuji to work on studying. He knows the park may not be the most ideal atmosphere for studying, because there do tend to be a lot of distractions, but this meeting is more for Ren to get an idea of _how_ Ryuji takes notes, and _how_ Ryuji studies more so than actually having him do either of those things. 

He still manages to find a quiet spot, secluded away from a lot of the activity, next to a body of water and beside a tall tree, though.

Digging through his bag, Ren grabs all of his notebooks and lays them out in front of his crossed legs. 

It may not seem like it, because he’s always staring out of the window instead of focusing on the teacher, but he does pay attention in class. He does hear everything that the teacher is saying. He even memorizes it, writing it down in a notebook right after class, just to make sure he has all the information for later studying purposes.

Much like now.

Just as Ren finds a pen in the bottom of his bag, a pile of notebooks and papers rain down on his lap. Frowning, he sets aside his bag and picks up one of the notebooks and a few pieces of paper before looking up at the source of the shower.

“This is it?”

“What were you expectin’?” Ryuji mutters gruffly, sitting down on the ground next to Ren. “Some prim and proper bullshit like what you got there? You said you wanted to see my notes, these are my notes.”

“I... but...”

Frowning deeper, Ren looks over what he has in his hands. The loose sheets of paper appear to be almost-half-done homework assignments that never got turned in, with more than half of them having frustrated scribbling over the whole front of the page. 

On the other hand, the notebooks have even less in terms of information related to school.

“Ryuji, there’s nothing but doodles in this notebook.”

“Oh, don’t worry,” Ryuji replies defensively, frowning as he looks at the notebook in Ren’s hand, then back up at his friend, “there’s literally nothing but doodling in _all_ of these notebooks.” As if to prove a point that doesn’t really need to be made, he reaches for the notebook labeled ENGLISH and opens it up to a random page, shoving it into Ren’s hands, forcing him to drop what he’s already holding. “Here. Here’s one I did of Captain Kidd.”

“It’s really good, Ryuji,” he murmurs. Indeed it is a very good drawing. It looks almost exactly like Captain Kidd, down to the last detail. “I, but... You’re supposed to be taking notes in this notebook. Not perfecting your drawing skills.”

“Eh, who honestly cares? It ain’t like I’m going to America or nothin’. The hell does someone like me need to learn English for?” He waves a hand dismissively, pushing himself to get up. “Now, if you’ll excuse me—.”

“Oh no,” Ren replies, pulling Ryuji back down by the hand, “you’re not going anywhere. I asked you here because I want to help you study and I intend to help you study.”

Ryuji groans loudly and sits back down in his precious spot, snatching away the notebook Ren has. Looking through the spread of random papers and different notebooks, he reaches for one of the notebooks that Ren brought, proceeding to flip through the pages rather quickly. His frown deepens into a scowl with every page before he eventually closes the notebook and tosses it back down on the pile with the others with a frustrated growl.

Ren frowns, watching the notebook land back on the pile, but he’s mostly concerned with how upset Ryuji seems to be. He’s never seen him this hostile, this frustrated. Is studying really that much of a sore spot for him?

“Holy shit. Are you effin’ kiddin’ me, Ren? You don’t even _pay attention_ in class. Ann says all you do is stare out the goddamn window. How the eff do you got all that information in there? How the _eff_ are you top of our class when you don’t pay any goddamn attention? I stare out the window during class and I remember jack shit. Are you seriously effin’ good at everything, Ren?”

Ren frowns deeper, but not because Ryuji is clearly trying to strike a nerve with him. He can tell the difference between his best friend genuinely trying to hurt someone and just blowing off steam. What he’s doing right now is clearly the latter.

“There’s stuff I’m not good at, too.”

“Oh yeah? Like what?”

“I can’t draw like you apparently can.”

“Oh, don’t effin’ patronize me!” Ryuji spits, collecting up his notebooks and papers in a pile. “You’re perfect where it counts. Me? I’m just the idiot who can’t pay attention in class and gets shitty grades. Class is just so fucking boring. It isn’t my goddam fault that my mind wanders when the teachers talk. Maybe if they didn’t drone on an on and on! Maybe _then_ I might be able to pay some fucking attention to—.”

“Wait, what was that?”

Ryuji scowls at being interrupted but says nothing of it, bouncing his leg impatiently. “What was _what_?”

“What you just said. What was that?”

“Really? I don’t effin’ know! I’m just effin’ venting. I don’t know what I just said,” he growls under his breath. “What? Something about it being difficult to pay attention in class? I dunno! Class is effin’ long as shit and the teacher talks _forever_ without taking a goddamn _breath_. How the fuck am I supposed to pay attention to that shit for an hour?”

“Ryuji, will you try something for me?”

Ryuji narrows his eyes at Ren, eyeing him for a moment as if he would ever ask him to do something dangerous or hard or something he can’t do. This is Ren they’re talking about: the most perfect man in the world.

“Fine. What?”

Ripping a piece of paper cleanly out of the back of one of his notebooks, he grabs a random textbook to have a hard surface to write on. On the page, he begins to write down one of the math problems he had been asked during a recent class. One that had been randomly thrown at him, to make sure he was listening.

He hands everything in his hands to Ryuji. “Solve this.”

Ryuji takes one look at the problem. A small glance. A literal tiny peak at it, if even that. He barely gives himself time to absorb the information on the page, except that it’s math and he doesn’t want to do it, “I can’t,” he says, pushing the page out of the way.

“Yes you can. Just try.”

Leaning in, Ren puts his hand over the portion of the math problem that doesn’t need to be solved first. The action leaves nothing more than a simple arithmetic question, one that anyone at their level could answer.

“Answer that.”

“Simple. Three.”

Ren takes his hand away to reveal the rest of the question. “Now, solve the rest of it.”

Ryuji frowns at the page for a moment, looking between the half of the problem he’s already solved and the other half of the problem he hadn’t solved. Doing what Ren had just done, he puts his hand over the portion of the problem that he already answered and focuses on the part that he hasn’t answered.

“Ten?”

“Yes!” Ren grins. “See? I knew you could do it.”

“What did you do?”

“I didn’t do anything. I just got rid of the part that doesn’t matter first. You did the rest on your own. You answered that on your own.”

“I...” Ryuji frowns, looking back down at the page for a moment, puzzled. Looking at again in that frame of reference, it actually looks easy. Not daunting or impossible at all. He just got so used to everything feeling like a giant beast, that he... has started shoving away everything, despite it not being that hard. Apparently. “Does that work for everything? How come no one has ever told me I can do that before?”

“Yes. Taking stuff bit by bit works for everything,” he says, nodding. To the second part of the statement, he says, “I don’t think anyone’s ever known they need to.”

“Need to?” Ryuji frowns to himself, looking down at one of his notebooks. He flips through the pages, looking at all of his drawings. They’re indeed really good and he doesn’t at all regret doing any of them. He’s just glad Ren didn’t open to the last page or anything. “I... I don’t understand.”

“I don’t really know how to explain it to you,” Ren admits, blushing. He’s usually really good at explaining things, but for some reason, not this. Not to mention, he kind of doesn’t want to, because he doesn’t want to upset Ryuji by making him think there’s something wrong with him, but he also isn’t a doctor and doesn’t have the right to diagnose people with anything. There is the chance he could be wrong, but he’s almost positive Ryuji’s issue is ADHD and not whether not he’s smart. “I just... I think I know how to help you. If you’re willing to let me try.”

Ryuji sighs. “I guess so,” he murmurs, leaning back on his hands. “I just think there’s better things we could be doing with our time. That was a fluke or something. You’re just gonna get frustrated with me and stop trying. Everyone does.”

Ren frowns, feeling a pang in his chest at that last comment. Sure, the question he gave Ryuji was more of a test than anything, because it wasn’t even a question that would be on any of their exams, but it did shed some light for him onto the way Ryuji thinks and processes information. The fact he feels like everyone has given up on trying to help him learn only makes Ren want to help him even more.

“Listen, Ryuji, us Phantom Thieves stick together, and... but, also you’re my best friend. I would never abandon you, not for any reason. I just want to see you succeed. You’re not going to frustrate me enough that I want to give up on you.”

What he _doesn’t_ say is that Ryuji already frustrates him, but for a reason entirely unrelated to their schoolwork. Nothing Ryuji could possibly ever do could be more frustrating than being sexually frustrating.

“Renren...” Ryuji frowns, looking down at his hands, then up at the sky, tilting his head back. Ren knows what’s going on but he doesn’t draw attention to it, just frowns and looks away to his own notebooks. “I... Fine. If you want to help me, I will let you help me, but you have to know now that I’m impossible. I get distracted easily, I find all this shit super boring, and I just generally really effin’ hate school.”

“I can work with that.”

“You’re something else, you know that?”

“So I’ve been told.” Ren grins, reaching out to pat Ryuji’s knee. “Let’s start by getting you some actual notes to work with, hmm? You can use mine. We’ll use your phone to take a picture of what’s important for the exams and get you a new notebook to write it down in, all right?”

Tilting his head forward, Ryuji looks at Ren, a single tear sliding down his cheek that he had sworn he got control of before looking back at his friend. He spends a few moments just sort of staring, watching his mouth move as he wipes his eyes, before a part of his brain tunes him back in, only catching the last bit of what he was saying.

_“...all right?”_

“All right... what?” Ryuji echos, frowning. “Sorry, I didn’t hear what you said.”

Ren laughs and scoots closer to Ryuji. “No problem,” he says, and goes over it again. This time, though, he snatches Ryuji’s phone from his pocket, to actively do what he’s talking about instead of just droning on about it. Taking pictures is much more fun than talking about taking pictures, anyway. “Like this.”

_You’re such an idiot, Ren. I don’t deserve this._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is based off my own experiences with how someone helped me learn to study, so I’m going off of that. In fact, most of Ryuji’s experiences are based off my own.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  _comes out of the hole I live in, updates this after a billion years, crawls back into my hole_  
>    
> Yell at me on Twitter @aqono_luna; I’m always there lol

Ryuji hasn’t heard from Ren for a couple of days.

That is, he hasn’t heard from Ren outside of school for a few days. He sees him plenty during lunchtime and after school, right before he runs off to do whatever he needs to do.

It’s not unheard of; it’s not like he doesn’t have other things to do, like whatever it is he needs to do with all the people he keeps calling confidants. He doesn’t know who those people are, but he’s sure it’s important that Ren hang out with those people, especially if they help them out as the Phantom Thieves somehow.

He just... he’s starting to miss his best friend.

Also, exams are in a couple of days and he hasn’t gotten any real studying in. The only studying he did was when he was with Ren at the park, and that wasn’t so much studying as it was taking pictures of notes from his notebook.

Right now, he’s in the process of copying the notes from the images into his own notebook, but he’s getting bored. He’s slowly burning out and losing interest. This isn’t fun or interesting, and he frankly has no reason to care about the subject matter. He’s already expected to fail the exam, so it’s not like it matters that much if he tries to do well.

Ren really did have a lot of misplaced faith in him.

“Urgh!” Ryuji growls and gets up from the little desk in his bedroom. He tosses the pen he’s been using on the ground and starts to pace the room, muttering to himself. “If you were gonna spend more time with everyone else than me, then why the fuck did you bother with me? I ain’t good at this shit; I ain’t just gonna effin pass just because I got up and _went to school_ like you did, Ren!” He’s ranting for the sake of it; ranting because it’s making him feel better.

Kind of...

...sort of...

...a little bit.

“God damn it!”

Just as Ryuji slams his fists down onto his desk, he hears a faint knock at his door. Expecting it to be his mother, worried about why he’s lost his temper again, he takes a moment to straighten himself up before going to answer the door.

Ryuji doesn’t see his mother.

“What do you want?” he hears himself asking. The venom in his words sounds and feels strange, but it’s not wrong. He’s already pissed, so he might as well keep being that. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m here to help you study for exams.”

“Wonderful. There’s no effin point. Exams are in four effin’ days and I don’t know shit about what’s gonna be on ‘em,” he spits, but still moves out of the way so Ren can come into his room. “You shoulda probably started coming over, like, four effin days ago, huh?”

“I-I’m sorry...” Ren frowns and pauses in his pursuit of coming into the room, biting his lip. “I got busy.”

“Right. Too busy to help me study, after making such a _big fucking deal about it_ a couple days ago,” he said. Is his anger truly necessary? No, not at all. But he’s upset from trying to study on his own and he’s upset from being blown off and Ren unfortunately happens to be here to deal with his frustration. “Why the hell did you even bother with me if you were just gonna get too damn busy?”

Ryuji is just ranting. He doesn’t mean what he’s saying. He gets upset and he goes off on rants and when he finally blows off enough steam, he backs down. That’s how it’s always been and Ren accepts that. He understands that. It’s just part of who his best friend is.

So then...

...why does it sting so much when Ryuji says,

“I bet you’ve made time for— No, _I’m sorry_ , _you_ don’t _need to_ because yer _smart_. You don’t need to study, so the hell does it matter to you if you make time fer it or not? Of course you can go hang with yer confidants or whatever. You can just _hear shit once_ and memorize it. So of course you can go hang out with people that are supposed to help _all of us _, but for some reason _only you_ get to know them! Honestly...” He shakes his head, sniffing. “So much for not abandoning me. I _knew_ you were gonna get frustrated with me.”__

____

_So much for not abandoning me_.

____

“Ryuji...” Ren swallows hard, pushing back the pang in his chest. Again, he _knows_ Ryuji is just ranting because he’s frustrated. He can tell by looking at his desk that he’s been trying to study; been trying to copy notes. He can also tell by the crumpled up paper tossed by the waste bin that he’s been getting frustrated with taking those notes. “I... _I’m sorry._ I...”

____

There’s nothing _to_ say. There’s nothing he _can_ say. He was the one who’d texted Ryuji to meet him at the park; he was the one who made a big deal about helping him study for exams. He was the one who proceeded to let confidants be more important than helping his best friend study for a week’s worth of exams that start in four days, after literally telling him that Phantom Thieves stick together and he’s not going to abandon him.

____

What was the point of confidants if he couldn’t even keep his promises to the team he had confidants for?

____

“I’m sorry,” he says again, but his tone is more...shaky than before. He puts his bag on the ground and closes the distance between himself and Ryuji, pulling his best friend into a hug. He has no idea why, but he feels he needs to. He wraps his arms around his waist, gently guiding Ryuji’s forehead to his shoulder. “I’m so sorry. I... You’re right, Ryuji. I... I made a big deal out of helping you and then I wasn’t there to do it when I should’ve been. You should’ve come first.”

____

Ryuji suddenly relaxes in Ren’s hold. A moment later, he wraps his arms around his back, pressing himself a little bit closer to him. They proceed to just stand there, embracing one another, until Ryuji suddenly starts to shake slightly in Ren’s hold.

____

“I’m not gonna pass these fuckin’ exams,” Ryuji says, barely above a whisper. His voice is cracking and Ren swears he can feel tears collecting on shoulder. “This is your fault, you asshole.” There’s no venom behind his words. He’s not even angry. He’s just upset. Crying. Frustrated. “I was _just fine_ lettin’ myself fail again, but then _you_ had to try and show me I could do it, and now I actually _wanna_ do well, but I’m just... I’m too fucking stupid.”

____

Reflexively, Ren tightens his hold on Ryuji. “You are _not_ stupid,” he says, his voice shaking. He threads a hand in fluffy blond hair, his heart racing when he realizes how upset Ryuji is. He can _feel_ that he’s crying just by the way his head is moving. If he felt like an asshole before, he really feels like one now. “You’re one of the smartest people I know. You have amazing battle tactics in the Metaverse; you come up with amazing calling cards _and_ you’re stealthy about delivering them; you know so much about sports and how to stay fit and healthy. You know so much, Ryuji. Having _attention issues_ does not mean you’re stupid,” he says.

____

“Great. I can hit shit with a mace and I can run fast, but not _fast enough_ to get a scholarship to make things easy on my mom,” he replies, scoffing and shaking his head as he goes to pull away from Ren. “This is a waste of time. You should just go. There’s clearly no reason for you t’ be—”

____

Ren grabs Ryuji’s hand and stops him in his tracks. “You’re my best friend and I love you, Ryu,” he says, biting his lip slightly. When he gets his best friend’s attention (because how could he not by literally telling Ryuji he loves him), he continues. “You are _not_ a waste of time. I... _want_ to help you pass. Because I love you. Because I believe in you. Because _I know_ you know this material, and I want to prove it to you. You’re more than just some guy who can swing a mace. You’re intelligent, Ryuji. Let me prove it to you.”

____

“Exams are—”

____

“This isn’t about exams. Those don’t matter. This is about _proving to you_ that you’re smart. I’m going to help you study for exams because I _promised_ I would, and we have to take them, but this isn’t about exams; this is about showing you you’re intelligent,” he says. Swallowing heavily, he adds, “I _promise_ I won’t flake on you again. Every day between now and exams will be about studying, all right? I won’t... I’m not going to go easy on you, because I know you can do it, but I _promise_ I won’t flake.”

____

Ryuji swallows, looking at his hand that’s clasped with Ren’s. It’s strangely tingly, holding his hand like this, but he’s not sure why. Probably just because his hands are cold whereas his own are hot, causing them to even out temperature-wise.

____

“I...” Ryuji sniffs, swallows, and looks down at his free hand. “I believed you a couple days ago, too.”

____

“You don’t have to believe me. Just let me show you I mean it. I’m here now; we’ll start now.” He pauses for a moment, looking down at Ryuji to meet his gaze. “Please...” he whispers. “Please let me help you. I just want to see you succeed. I just want to see you be happy, Ryuji. I’m sorry I messed up, but I’m here now. Please... I... I just want to help. I...”

____

Ryuji sighs through his nose.

____

“Whatever,” he says, and lets go of Ren’s hand, going back to his desk to sit down. “It’s pointless and we don’t have enough time, but you’re here now, so you might as well stay. Maybe instead of getting all the questions wrong, I’ll get all of them except _two_ wrong.”

____

Ren swallows a lump in his throat, but sits down on Ryuji’s bed. “Come sit beside me,” he says, patting the spot to his left. “Let’s talk about something before we start studying.”

____

“I can talk from right here, Ren,” he says. “If it’s more of your inspirational crap, just save it. You’ve said it. I’m lettin’ you stay. Let’s just get to studying.” Not that he feels like studying now, but he’s positive he can’t make Ren leave, so he might as well just let it happen for a couple hours before he has to leave for something else. “All right?”

____

“That’s not what I was going to say.”

____

Ryuji sighs. “Then what were you going to say, Ren?”

____

“Do...” _Do you want me to go?_ That’s not the right thing to ask. It’s not the right thing to do. As soon as he asks that, Ryuji will tell to leave, and it’ll only further make him feel abandoned, he’s sure of it. “Let’s watch a movie.”

____

“A movie?” Ryuji echos, frowning. “What about studying?”

____

“A short movie. A Destinyland movie,” he says, biting back a soft smile when that seems to pique Ryuji’s interest. It’s so cute how much he loves those movies. “We can watch your favorite pirate one first, then we’ll study. We have all night to study.”

____

“Are you sure?”

____

“I’m positive.”

____

Ryuji seems to hesitate for a moment, but then nods and gets up, moving over to the bed with Ren. Fishing his phone out of his pocket, he says, “We’ll hafta watch it on here. I accidentally broke my TV.” His bad mood is already starting to slip.

____

Ren doesn’t ask. Plus, if it means he can lay close to Ryuji, then he’d gladly watch it on his phone whether the television was broken or not. “That’s perfect,” he says, as the both of them lay down on his bed, shoulder to shoulder. Once they’re both comfortable, he gestures for Ryuji to bring up the movie, smiling. “Go ahead.”

____

After all, it’s just one movie, and it’s not like any studying is going to get done if Ryuji’s worked up. If he struggles to pay attention normally, then him being angry certainly isn’t going to help.

____

Plus, Ryuji’s just so cute when he watches pirate movies.

____


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter is so short! I’ve been in a bad funk the last couple of days/week or so and I’m just trying to get out of it.
> 
> Thanks for reading!

It’s just before three in the afternoon when the movie ends.

“Ah, man, that was great!” Ryuji laughs as he stands up from the bed, shaking out his leg. It’s gone a bit stiff from the lack of movement for the last two and a half hours, but he doesn’t seem to mind. “I don’t think I’m ever gonna grow tired of that movie!”

Ren grins.

...because Ryuji’s excitement over the movie is giving him an idea he thinks might just be crazy enough to work.

...but also because Ryuji is insanely cute.

“I’m glad you enjoyed it.” Ren’s grin softens to a smile as he gets up from the bed, glancing at the desk where Ryuji’s attempts at studying are laying haphazardly about the small surface and surrounding floor. “We should get to studying, lest we run out of time today.”

“Aw, do we have to?” Ryuji protests, frowning. He turns his attention to where Ren is looking, only for his frown to deepen into a scowl. The strewn about papers only serve as a reminder of how insanely difficult studying is for him. “I’d much rather watch another movie.”

There it is.

 _Perfect_.

“All right,” Ren says with a warm smile. “What movie do you want to watch?”

Ryuji looks utterly surprised, which is admittedly how Ren expected him to look. His best friend is watching him, eyeing him, trying to figure out if there’s something more to the sudden approval of watching another movie.

Ryuji is smart; Ren is certain he’ll figure it out.

“Does this hafta to do something with me studyin’?” Ryuji finally asks. It took him about two minutes to reach that conclusion, but Ren’s heart does flips. He knew his best friend could reason, if just given the opportunity to do so. “How’re ya plannin’ on usin’ the movie I’m thinkin’ of t’ help me study?”

“Well... What movie did you have in mind?”

“Oh. Uh... _Like a Dragon_?” Ryuji offers. “Y’know, that Yakuza movie that was in theaters a couple months ago.”

“Is that one your favorite?”

“B’sides the pirate one we just watched?” he asked. “Yes. I’d say it’s one’a my favorites. I don’t actually get’t watch it very often ‘cause my mom doesn’t like it, but... Yeah. I’d like to watch it.”

“All right.” Ren smiles softly and nods. “Just a second.” 

Ren pulls out his phone, looking up details for that movie. It’s rated R15+; it has an overall ninety percent positivity rating; and (this is what he cares about right now) its total runtime is one hundred and fifty-five minutes.

“All right,” Ren says again and pockets his phone, looking up at Ryuji. “That movie has an overall runtime of a hundred and fifty-five minute,” he begins: “So let’s say... for every ten minutes you study, you’ll earn five minutes of the movie. If I quiz you on something and you can recall the answer, that’ll be ten more minutes of the movie.”

Ryuji frowns, furrows his eyebrows, and stares at Ren.

The wheels in Ryuji’s head are clearly turning.

Ren patiently lets it happen.

“So...” He begins slowly, after about five minutes of careful thinking (and fierce scribbling on a piece of scrap paper). “If I wanna earn the whole movie based solely on studyin’ and not factor in random questions ya could ask me,” he says, “I would hafta study for, like, over five hours. I dunno if I can focus that long.”

Ren may very well explode from how proud he is of Ryuji. He did that math problem exactly as he had shown him a couple days ago, and he got the answer absolutely right.

“You can take mental breaks. Pause to doodle; get some food or water; fidget with something. Whatever you need to do. You don’t have to study nonstop for five hours,” Ren explains. “I mean... You don’t earn any time toward your movie, if you’re not studying, of course, but I’m just telling you that so you know, not to dissuade you from taking mental breaks. In fact, I encourage it. Burning yourself out is only going to make you hate studying more.”

“Will ya study and watch the movie with me?”

Ren grins brightly, a light flush dusting over his nose and the apples of his cheeks despite himself. It’s certainly not, but for some reason Ryuji’s request for them to study and watch the movie together feels like he’s being asked out on a date.

“Of course, Ryu. I wouldn’t dream of doing anything else.”

“What if I end up earning that movie?”

“We’ll do this again, but with another movie, until all of our exams are over,” he says, “and then we’ll start over again for new tests and new exams. If this works, then we’ll do it for all of your studying.”

Ryuji smiles softly and considers everything.

“Okay. Well... Um... Y’know what?” He pauses for a moment to organize his thoughts. “All right then, Renren,” he says with a soft smile and a nod, moving over to his desk to sit down. “Let’s give yer thing a try, I guess. It sounds like maybe it’ll work.”

Ren smiles as well, moving over to Ryuji’s desk to sit down beside him. Picking up his school bag, he rummages through it until he finds his notes specifically for the exam and lays them out on the desk.

“You don’t have to worry about copying notes from those pictures,” he said. After all, it didn’t seem like he was having an easy time with it, and there was no point if he was here to offer his actual notes. “I do want you to copy my notes, though. It’ll help you put it to memory, all right?”

“Does that count as studyin’?”

Ren smiles. “Of course it does.”

“Can I listen t’ music?”

Ren’s smile grows brighter, getting out his phone to pull up whatever music Ryuji wants. “Of course you can!” he says. “What music did you have in mind?”

“The _Power Intuition_ soundtrack,” he says almost shyly, as if he thinks the request is ridiculous. It isn’t; not at all. In truth, Ren would have played Deathcore or something, if Ryuji really thought it would help him focus. “I was playing it yesterday and it’s such a good soundtrack! I’ve had it in my head for awhile now... and actually, it was the only reason I was able t’ focus as long as I could earlier. I only got frustrated ‘cause I was havin’ trouble readin’ yer notes.”

“Oh... Was it because the pictures were too small?”

Ryuji shrugs. “Prolly,” he murmurs. “Yer actual notes should be all right, now that yer here.” Opening up his notebook to a clean page and Ren’s notebook to the first page he needs to copy, he grabs a pen and indicates to his friend that he’s ready. “Go ahead and play the music.”

Ren smiles and presses play.

It’s insanely cute to Ren that Ryuji has legitimately no idea why this music is helping him focus, just that he knows that it does. (In short, the music is helping him focus because it’s a video game soundtrack, and video game music is created with keeping someone’s attention in mind.) The fact he’s the one who suggested it, knowing that it helps him, even if he doesn’t know why? That makes his heart do even more flips.

The summersaults his heart keeps doing can’t be normal.

Ren doesn’t mind them.

Why would he?

After all, Ryuji is really trying to help himself and is, in the process, proving to himself he’s smarter than he thinks he is. Ren can see that growing confidence. What isn’t there to cherish and love about that? He couldn’t possibly be more proud of his best friend.

Especially because he’s already studied for ten minutes.

Ren sets a stopwatch and a counter on his phone (the stopwatch to keep track of the minutes he studies and the counter to keep track of how many five minutes movie intervals he’s earned out of thirty-one total) so he can keep track. It’s the fairest way to ensure everything Ryuji does is accounted for, so that he earns his movie.

“Once you get about a fourth through each of the sections,” Ren says, shifting in his seat to put his legs under his body, “we can stop so I can try quizzing you on a couple things. You’d be surprised what simply copying down notes can help you retain.”

Plus, it would break things up for Ryuji; prevent things from becoming too monotonous, which is something he knows for a fact Ryuji hates.

“Okay.” Ryuji smiles, having stopped copying notes for a moment to respond to Ren. He looks back down to continue as he says, “That works for me. I trust you, Renren. If ya say it’ll work, then... Sure. I believe it’ll work, too.”

Ren’s heart just about leaps out of his chest.

Ryuji has no idea how long Ren has wanted to hear him say that; has wanted to hear him believe in himself and what he’s capable of doing...

It’s as sweet as Ren expected.

...and makes him want to push to hear it more and more.

_I love you so much, Ryuji Sakamoto._


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So
> 
> Hi there ^_^;;;
> 
> It’s been awhile since I updated this and for that I’m so sorry — and I’m so sorry this update is so short, too. It’s a transitional chapter. I promise the next one will be longer.
> 
> Thanks for putting up with my horribly sporadic uploading!!!

Ryuji and Ren study borderline endlessly for their exams. They study every single day leading up to when their first exam is supposed to take place. Ren doesn’t hang out with any of his confidants; doesn’t call to order any Phantom Thieves meetings. The less than a week they have until exams are dedicated to helping Ryuji pass and helping Ryuji pass exclusively.

If it’s the _last thing Ren does,_ he’s going to show Ryuji he can do this and he can do this well.

Understandably, by the time the day of their first exam finally rolls around, Ryuji is ridiculously nervous. He’s so filled to the brim with raw, nervous energy that he’s threatening to wear a hole in the concrete road just outside Shujin Academy.

It’s almost making _Ren_ nervous, practically threatening to shatter his normally unbreakable mask of calm and cool collectedness.

“Ryuji,” Ren says, a certain air of insistence to his tone that somehow, _for some reason,_ has his friend _obeying_ the simple command that was simply saying his name. 

It’s surprising, really, to say the least, that Ryuji heeds the command so easily, but, at least for right now, Ren doesn’t bother to say anything about it.

(There’s a time and a place for everything.)

(Now, in front of school, isn’t the time or the place.)

(At least he got his friend’s attention.)

“Please calm down, Ryuji,” he says gently now that he has his full attention. 

His voice is gentle knowing full well how a statement like that can potentially come across if he isn’t tactful about it. He doesn’t want to add to Ryuji’s raw nervousness; doesn’t want to agitate him even more because the intent behind telling him to ‘calm down’ was misinterpreted. 

“I know it isn’t your intention; I know you’re not _trying_ to make me anxious, but _please_ stop pacing,” he almost begs. “I promise you everything is going to be alright. You’ll end up doing great on your exams, I’m sure of it. We spent so much time studying.”

It takes all of the energy and force in the world for Ryuji to stop pacing, but Ren is so grateful when he does. Sure, now he’s standing there and bouncing his leg thirteen ways to Sunday, but at least he’s not about to pace a hole into the ground. He can deal with bouncing legs versus nervous pacing. Hell, he’s even _used_ to leg-bouncing versus the aforementioned pacing.

“What if I don’t do well?”

“You’re going to do well, Ryuji.”

“Yeah, but what if I don’t…? What if all that studying was for nothing and I end up forgetting everything that I studied? I don’t think I could take it if—”

Strike that.

Ren would take the pacing over _this_ any day _;_ would take the pacing over Ryuji second-guessing himself and doubting all of his hard work.

“Ryuji, listen to me—”

Ren’s hands are suddenly, quite firmly, on Ryuji’s shoulders, making his friend look at him — and a weird surge of _something_ fills the air in between them, dancing amongst their senses.

It’s clear that both of them notice it, but it’s also clear neither of them want to comment on it; clear that both of them are aware there isn’t _enough_ _time_ right now.

“I swear on _my honor_ that you’re going to do well on these exams,” he says. “You mentioned while we were studying that you used to be a C-student when you were trying to study? Well, we employed a lot of good studying habits and techniques, so you’ll get a B on your exams, easy! Hell, maybe even an A! You are so, so intelligent. You _have this,_ Ryuji.”

Ryuji believes Ren.

 _Of course_ Ryuji believes Ren.

This is the same exact person that Ryuji followed into Kamoshida’s palace in April, even after knowing for less than hour; this is the same person he sacrificed his life to at the end of said hour, so he could get out of the palace alive.

This is the _same person_ who dragged Ryuji through palace after palace, through all the various depths of Mementos through dangerous situations — and he trusted him then.

 _Of course_ Ryuji believes Ren now.

“I just wanna make my mama proud,” Ryuji says, looking down at the ground between himself and Ren, who is standing so close it feels _warm._ “I don’t think I can handle doing all that studying and I end up taking another failing grade to my ma. I can’t handle hearing her say _‘Don’t worry, Sunflower, you’re going to do better next time. I just know it.’_ one more time.”

Ryuji sighs, bouncing his leg again as he lets himself look back up at Ren, who’s grey eyes are damn near piercing his soul with their intensity. He thinks he sees something a bit sad in them, but he might just be seeing things.

Ren Amamiya publicly sad?

Never.

“You promise I can do this, Renren?”

“I _promise_ you can do this, Ryuji,” he says softly, a smile forming across his lips. “I _swear_ to you that you can do this.”

It’s a good thing they got to school early. Getting there early left plenty of time for this breakdown before they had to head into the school for their exams.

The positives of planning early, apparently.

“More importantly,” Ren adds, taking his hands off Ryuji’s shoulder, much to the very obvious dismay of them both: _“You’re_ going to realize you can do it. After today’s exam, I promise you’ll realize all that studying wasn’t for naught and you’ll breeze through the rest of them, worry free.”

Ryuji nods.

For a few moments, they stare at one another, taking each other in. They are so early for school that the teachers have barely started showing up. Ryuji has no idea why Ren dragged him here so early, but he finds himself not particularly minding it as they stand in front of the school, the sun barely having risen, staring at one another as if there isn’t anything else to look at around here.

It’s kind of like they’re seeing one another for the first time.

Strange.

Then again, it’s kind of felt like that for a solid week, so Ryuji’s not entirely sure why it feels so new right now — or why he doesn’t want this to end; why he desperately doesn’t want to go separate ways from his best friend, even if he knows for a fact he’ll see him at lunch.

What’s so new now?

“You got this, Ryuji. Right? You can do this?”

“I… Y-Yeah. I think so,” Ryuji says and nods. “We’ve been studyin’ for awhile now, but I guess I just got nervous. I don’t want to do bad on these exams. I don’t think I could take it if after all that, I still failed, y’know? It’s like… I couldn’t handle it if, I dunno, failing is the best I can do.”

Ren shifts his weight from one foot to another, smiling softly as he rubs the back of his neck idly, then moves his hand to fidget with his bangs.

“It isn’t going to be like that.”

“I know it isn’t,” Ryuji says, and Ren grins, dropping his hand and straightening up. “It isn’t going to be like that because I… think I believe in myself. I think — no… I _know_ I got this. I can do this. We didn’t do all that studying for nothing, right?”

Ren beams brightly, his grey eyes filling with so much pride for his best friend. He loves his confidence and if nothing else, that confidence is what he’s been working toward this whole time.

If Ryuji is confident, he can do just about anything. Ren has always thought that; has always seen that. Especially in the Metaverse, where his best friend is his most confident.

“Right.” 

Ren’s beam fades to a smile and he hugs Ryuji tightly. It doesn’t last long, if only because people are starting to file in for the day and he doesn’t want to cause anything awkward for Ryuji. He already deals with so much as it is...

He doesn’t need stigma on top of it.

“I’m so proud of you, Ryuji. You got this,” he says. “Now go on in there and give it your all, alright? We’ll talk about how it was for you during lunch, okay?”

Ryuji nods and sneaks one last hug (and Ren swears he just about melts into it) before he steps away from his friend.

“See you on the roof at lunchtime!” he says, sort of slowly working his way to the staircase that leads into the school.

Ren smiles again and watches him leave.

Just so it isn’t awkward, he doesn’t immediately follow after Ryuji. They made a whole show of going their separate ways; he doesn’t want to make things awkward by following him into the school.

When Ren is sure Ryuji is in the school and to his classroom (or maybe at the school store getting something to eat, which sounds like a nice idea), he starts to head into the school, as well.

Suddenly, he’s overcome with his own bout of nervous energy, and he has to force himself to not fidget.

He _cannot wait_ to talk to Ryuji at lunch.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m not going to promise to have the next chapter up anytime soon (but I’ll try to), because as soon as I do, executive dysfunction makes everything a nightmare... 
> 
> But here’s this chapter! Enjoy!

Ryuji does end up getting something to eat before the exam. 

He has to. 

There is no way he would be able to survive the entire exam on an empty stomach like this. 

The growling in his stomach would be too distracting, which is the exact opposite of what he wants. He wants to be as focused on this exam as he possibly can; he wants to give himself the best possible setup for success that he can.

Ryuji wants to do well on this exam.

For so many reasons.

Ren has spent countless hours helping him study for this exam. Sure, they had a bit of a tiff a couple days ago over him spending more time with his “confidants” than with helping him study, but that’s behind them now; they’ve long since studied, and Ryuji… well…

He thinks he feels ready, if not incredibly nervous for what the outcome of all his preparation will be.

In all his nervousness for the exam, he left his apartment without eating any breakfast, so he knows he needs to stop at the school store and pick up a little something. It’s not a lot and it’s not interesting (he just picks up some bread and some instant ramen he has the student working the register do up for him for a little extra money) but at least it’s enough to fuel him until lunch.

He’s sure Ren would be proud.

…and for some reason, the notion of making Ren proud adds a little spring to Ryuji’s step as he takes his ramen (the bread stuffed in his bag for later) and heads to the second floor to his classroom, eating his food as he walks up the steps.

It’s gone before he even finishes ascending the steps…

…and the bread is gone before he even gets to his classroom.

Maybe he was hungrier than he thought.

He throws away the trash in the appropriate bin located outside his classroom and then takes a moment to look up, seeing the room number labeled above the door, as if he has to second check where he is.

He knows where he is.

“I can do this,” he says to himself. “I did all that studying. I can do this. I got this. Ren believes in me and mama believes in me and…”

The realization startles Ryuji, but…

_ “…I believe in me.” _

…and Ryuji Sakamoto believing in himself is all he needs, and he knows that, because he is vibrating with excitement to go into the classroom, which is a feeling he’s never had before. Not even when he was doing track and had a reason to care about his classes.

It’s all thanks to Ren… and he’s going to have to properly thank him later, when this is all said and done.

The bell rings just as Ryuji takes his seat.

No one comments on the difference Ryuji is radiating; no one says anything about his overall alertness… or his straightened posture… or his obvious confidence…

…or the fact he is _actually_ _awake_ for once.

Not to his face, anyway. 

No one says anything to his face.

Ryuji can hear all the whispering around him, but it doesn’t bother him. Why would it? He knows what he’s supposed to be doing and he can do it and that’s  _ literally all that really matters _ to him.

He can do it.

“Alright, class,” the teacher says as soon as the bell has rung and the door to their classroom is closed. “Today marks the first day of exams. Put away everything except a writing utensil.”

Ryuji is already ready.

…and the best part is, he doesn’t even get nervous as the test booklets are all handed out and they’re told they can start on the exam.

_ He can totally do this. _

•••

Ren is barely paying attention to his exam.

As much as he hates to admit it, and knows it would be a terrible thing to ever say to Ryuji, he doesn’t have to. 

Not really. 

All the information he has ever learned in class, he’s learned without really paying attention, or by paying very little attention at all.

He just… _doesn’t have to_ _pay attention_ to absorb information. He can just vaguely hear things once or twice and then he just knows it. Forever.

Sometimes he finds himself wishing he could transfer some of his weird ability over to Ryuji, but hopefully all the studying he did with him and giving him study techniques is good enough in the long run and will help him do well on these exams.

Ren really wants Ryuji to do well — because he knows Ryuji will be happy if he does, and Ren will be happy to see him pass, as well. He can only imagine the way his face will light up when he realizes he can do well on these exams; when he—

“Thirty minutes left.”

_ Shit. _

“Come on, Ren,” Morgana says from the cubby of his desk. “You need to get this done. You can’t fail your exam when you’re expecting Ryuji to pass.”

“I know, I know,” he mumbles, turning his attention to the test, opening the test booklet. “Shut up and let me do this.”

He may not need to pay attention to absorb information, but he still needs time to read the questions… and answer the written portions — and he hopes like hell he has enough time.

Ryuji would feel so bad if Ren failed these.

Why has he been spending so much time only thinking about Ryuji lately? It has to be some kind of… trick, or something. It has to be a… a spell, perhaps? What else can it be if not that? Why else would he be so hypnotized over thinking about—?

“Ren,” Morgana hisses.  _ “Focus.” _

Right.

The exam.

Focus.  


On the exam.

...and not on the fact the _focus_ narrative has been exclusively driven toward Ryuji at least since Ren has known him (but probably longer) and now here he is... forcing himself to do the same thing... and being kicked into gear by his cat, which he’s realizing now is—

_Focus._

•••

On the plus side, with fifteen minutes to spare in the exam testing period, Ryuji is, for once,  _ actually done  _ with his exam.

He hasn’t gotten up to turn it in, of course, because no amount of studying for an exam and knowing the information is going to also fix his anxiety, which makes the thought of being the first one to turn in his finished exam terrifying...

...but at least he can have a little, mini celebration in his head knowing he’s actually done and doesn’t and doesn’t need to beg for more time to finish.

He does wonder if anyone else got done before him and has been sitting on turning in their exams, too, but… he can’t focus on that too much. He wants to feel good so if his own achievements — and not keep comparing himself to others.

...and it  _ is  _ an achievement he got done with any time to spare at all, especially because he kinda stumbled over reading some of the questions and had to reread them a few times to understand what he was being asked.

...but at least he’s done.

That’s all that matters.

When the bell rings, Ryuji gets up to turn in his exam, to the absolute surprise of his teacher who looks flabbergasted that he’s standing in line with everyone and not sitting back.

“You finished on, Sakamoto-kun.”

“Yeah,” Ryuji says, dropping down his exam in front of his teacher. “I had some help from a friend… He helped me study.”

“Hmm,” Ryuji’s teacher hums, then smiles, putting Ryuji’s exam on the pile with the rest. 

“Well, I’m happy to hear that there’s someone who has the time to motivate and work with you like you apparently need. Your exam will be graded with everyone else’s.”

Ryuji makes a muffled up sound and nods. “Thanks,” he murmurs and leaves the room for lunch — and to find Ren.

He has to tell him the good news.


End file.
